Sept 20
Week 2: Commanders Lose Jake Ferguson in the Middle of the End Zone
The Crime: The Commanders defense apparently mistakes Cowboys tight end Jake Ferguson for one of its own players and permits him to stand completely unattended in the middle of the end zone.
Down and Distance: First-and-goal. 9:53 remaining in the first half.
Defensive Strategy: Ignore the 6'5", 244-pound man wearing the opposing team’s uniform and hope Dak Prescott does the same.
Result: Prescott does not do the same. Touchdown.
Official Ruling: Are you effing kidding me?!
Degree of Difficulty: Zero. Ferguson was already in the end zone. The football merely had to locate him—which, notably, it managed to do.
Carm’s Coaching Note:
The middle of the end zone is generally considered a high-risk location for leaving a 6'5", 244-pound eligible receiver entirely unattended. Consider assigning literally anyone to stand near him.
Witten Index: 10/10
First-and-goal. Middle of the end zone. No defender within the immediate jurisdiction. The Commanders receive full marks for maximum failure under minimum difficulty.